”“That’s Contessa to you, and I’m looking SENSATIONAL, darling!”“Ok, Cuntessa. I see you got the invitation.”Helen gave a wink and kept ...miling. If she’d picked up on the “cuntessa” thing, she ignored it. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world! And you got the laptop. It’s yours, just the first of my four presents for your big day. Don’t worry, there’s nothing nefarious on it. The box is for Troy, he can open it after we talk.”“And I suppose some Best Buy cashier is out of a job for letting you walk. "What are yougoing to do?"I didn't answer right away, I was still trying to decide. I looked atthe announcement in the paper, and found the funeral home listed. Then Icalled it.I sat across from the home until they left, then I got out and wentinside. I told the funeral director who I was, and asked whatarrangements had been made.Everything they'd picked out was cheap, even the stone was minimal. Ipicked out the best of everything, casket, flowers, the dress she wouldbe buried in. and the. .. White-blonde hair, short and shaggy, styled to look like it hasn’t been styled. Her light fringe hangs down over dark eyebrows, but not far enough to hide her pretty eyes and prettier face. Her skin is smooth, very few lines - lots of make-up, and probably a little botox.She introduces herself in voice-over, “Hello ... My name’s Adrienne Huntington, I’m 42-years-old, and I’m from Swanage, in Dorset.”As she says Dorset in the voice-over, the figure on screen opens the front of her overcoat to. She wears black framed spectacles that look nerdy yet hot. A ring-shaped nose pin on her nose increases the oomph factor by notches. We stay in the same area (J.P Nagar, Bangalore) and on a random day in early April, I pinged her on WhatsApp complimenting on her really hot profile picture. One thing led to another and I invited her to share a drink near a famous watering hole in the area. She obliged and asked me to pick her up for which I was more than happy. She was wearing a black jeans pant.
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